{"product_id":"9781511615655","title":"Lesbian Princesses \u0026 Friends: Risque Fairy Tale Humor","description":"Prince: Fairy godmother, the princess I was supposed to marry is a lesbian. Can't you fix it so that she falls in love with me?\u003cbr\u003e Fairy Godmother: Certainly! Abracadabra!\u003cbr\u003e The Princess formerly known as Prince: This isn't what I had in mind! \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Princess: Any chance we can hook up with Cinderella?\u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: Sorry. She only likes guys who have big balls. \u003cbr\u003e Princess: What about her stepmother and stepsisters?\u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: The last I heard they were suffering from the black plague because someone was keeping pigeons, rats and mice as pets and feeding them from the kitchen. \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Princess: At church today the preacher said that in the afterlife lesbians go down below are chained up together for all eternity and whipped.\u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: What happens if we're bad?\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Princess: Father, my room was visited last night by the ghost of a beautiful woman!\u003cbr\u003e The King: What did you do?\u003cbr\u003e Princess: The other princess and I got sheet faced! \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Princess: What kind of flesh are my girlfriend and I allowed to eat on Fridays?\u003cbr\u003e Priest: None!\u003cbr\u003e Sister Agnes: Oh thank god, that's such a relief to know! \u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: She was afraid we'd done something wrong. \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Prince Charming: What are you two doing with my wife?!\u003cbr\u003e Snow White: See? I told you he wouldn't know.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Prince: I know you two aren't ever going to love me, but is there any chance you might consider a three-way?\u003cbr\u003e Princess: Sure, let's just check our schedule. \u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: We have an opening some time between When Hell Freezes Over and When Monkeys Fly Out of My (censored). Should we pencil you in?\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Princess: Mother, do you think this dress the other princess gave me is too low cut?\u003cbr\u003e Queen: That depends dear. Do you have a patch of curly hair on your chest?\u003cbr\u003e Princess: Of course not!\u003cbr\u003e Queen: Then yes, it's too low cut. \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Princess: I have solved all of our kingdom's tax problems. \u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: How?\u003cbr\u003e Princess: A funny little man just spent three nights spinning tons of straw into four huge rooms full of gold for me. \u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: Why did he do that?\u003cbr\u003e Princess: He said that in exchange he would return and take my first born child. \u003cbr\u003e Both: HAHAHAHAHAHA!\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Princess: What should we do tonight?\u003cbr\u003e Other Princess: I feel like eating out. \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Sister Agnes: Last night the two lesbian princesses found me in the garden, threw me to the ground, and made wicked love to me all night long. We must have committd a dozen different sins! Can you give me penance?\u003cbr\u003e Priest: Go and eat a lemon. \u003cbr\u003e Sister Agnes: Will that cleanse my soul?\u003cbr\u003e Priest: No, for that you have to repent. But it will wipe that smile off your face. \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Wendy Darling: If God did not want me to be a lesbian he wouldn't have filled the ocean with topless mermaids. \u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Witch: So what's it like being the godmother of two lesbian princesses? Does that mean you have to grant twice as many wishes? \u003cbr\u003e Fairy Godmother: Not really. They dress each other, they give each other jewelry, they always have a date to the ball, and if one of them needs a carriage the other one picks her up in hers. Once I refused to turn all the men in the kingdom to women, give all of the women H-cup breasts, or hand out love potions they pretty much left me alone.\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e 000\u003cbr\u003e \u003cbr\u003e Wendy Darling: If God didn't want me to be a lesbian he wouldn't have filled the ocean with topless mermaids.","brand":"CreateSpace Publishing","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":48530926895345,"sku":"9781511615655","price":14.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0674\/5433\/7265\/files\/9781511615655_p0.jpg?v=1786308601","url":"https:\/\/shop.barnesandnoble.com\/products\/9781511615655","provider":"Barnes \u0026 Noble","version":"1.0","type":"link"}